nothing else matters

Beyond wrong choices and the right ones, after those societal wins and defeats all that will be left is the hearts I touched and the things I stood for.
Love today and always,
Vikas
16-Dec-2011

a shrinking circle

[random thoughts in the shower :)]
I must have been a kid when I had started building these walls around myself. Every time I failed a test, got laughed at for being myself, got pushed around to forcefully compete or love failed me, I reacted and naturally more walls ensued.
Clock kept ticking, life kept happening, cautiousness kept increasing, innocence kept eroding and oh, the walls.... more of them kept coming.
The walls are at an arm distance now. No more can the bird spread it's wings, no more can it fly fearlessly in the sky!
Love,
Vikas
14-Dec-2011

हसीन गलतफ़हमी

dhoondta raha sacchai ko sacchai se hi saal dar saal har raah har dagar, aur phir us din jab sacchai se saamna hua to laga ki galatfemi kitni haseen aur kitni sacchi si thi.. aacha hota ye talaash adhoori hi reh jati...
Love,
Vikas
2-Dec-2011

a fall into nirvana

When I was climbing the mountain, they came, they conquered, they reigned, they finally succumbed to their own power. While I was still walking the woods, the same cycle succeeded with a different set of men having the same ego laden intentions.
Now, as I stand on the cliff many a yard above the ocean I again hear those familiar frenetic foot steps, I smell the same blood soaked hunger. This time I'll take a plunge into the infinite never to come back again.
Love,
Vikas
24-Nov-2011

अत्यल्प लम्हे

Scribbling after listening to some soulful music:
Is andhii daud main hazaroon ke beech ek bhatka hua katra hun main. Girta hun, sambhalta hun aur dobara girne tak bahut josh se daudta hun; aur phir achanak deti hai wahi pyas dil par dastaq, kabhi sangeet ban kar, kabhi baarish, kabhi kavita to kabhi kisi bache ki bematlab muskurahat ke roop main. Ruk jati hai zindagi aaise chand lamhon main ya main ye kahun ki in chand lamhon main muthhi bhar zindagi jee leta hun main..
Love,
Vikas
13-Nov-2011

continuance

It is a deja vu; I have the memory of the same thoughts, same patterns from yesterday and the week before and a month before and since what seems like forever. Sure the tangents have changed but my plane hasn't, my situations have changed but my perception hasn't. I am still a slave of my habits and passions, I still mistake my body and emotions to be me.
Shake me, hit me, crucify me to bring me back to life.
Much Love,
Vikas
8th-Nov-2011

choice? No thanks!

If you will, the advancement of our civilization may well be fathomed by the plethora of choices available to us even in the most trivial of decisions. But mind you, where our physical comforts may have been easy to come by, our mental-prowess/commitment/focus/single-mindedness have all taken a big hit in the bargain. Until one is rock-willed or has a wisdom of god, choice after all may not be such a good thing.
Love,
Vikas
7th-Nov-2011

freedom or 'I'?

Only one of these two will inhabit within us: Our "I" or the eternal-real-happiness (not fleeting pleasures). Once this is realized and chewed over, the choice of who stays is but easy :).
Love,
Vikas
6-Nov-2011

परिस्थिति

Aye uljhuae hue sawaal, mere maikadae ke saki, ya to de koi suraag ki tera jawaab mil jaye ya le le mujhse mere ye khwaab bhi ki jawaab ki pyaas na rahe.
Love,
Vikas
14-Oct-2011

God, thank you

God and I have an understanding, He exempts me from my prayers and visits to temples as long as I give 100% percent in everything I do.
Love,
Vikas
27-Sept-2011

कुछ लम्हे

scribblings in the middle of the night:
Jazbaton se, chup raton se, gum neendon se, in aankhon se kuch khwaab hain jhaankte,
barsoon se andhi daud bhaag rahe us shaks se kuch jawab hain wo maangte.
Poochte hain kabhi meri zindagi se ki ye zindagi kya hai, to kabhi palkon ko nam kar zindagi ko zindagi hain ye de jate.
Jeena isi ka naam hai,
Vikas
25-Sept-2011

complementaries

What good is an art without passion, an act without virtue, a heart without love or a life without cycling :).
Love,
Vikas
21-Sept-2011

your choice

Either pedal or perish :).
Keep riding,
Vikas
16-Sept-2011

being logical is illogical

The more I try to find logic the more I believe in miracles. Such abound beauty, the mother nature cannot be summed up with a couple of laws and some numbers.
Love,
Vikas
9-Sept-2011

looking for answers? trust Mother Nature...

Why they want what they want? When ego and greed have never fathered freedom then what is the mankind running frantically after? And so it started pouring while I was still in the woods. Ah! Silly me, I soaked into the abound beauty of mother nature. No questions remained, everything dissolved; including 'I' :).
Love,
Vikas
5-Sept-2011

'careful'? No, thanks!

....and then I became 'careful' in life. Careful from the their recklessness, seeing the society with the glasses of incredulity, loosing innocence in the wake of it's hidden motives. And now I question if questioning my naivety and slowly letting it evaporate was such a good idea. I'd rather be hurt and live in an illusion than be heavily laden with worldliness.
Love always,
Vikas
25-Aug-2011

it always comes down to a simple choice

In the middle of a bad consequence causing anguish, pain and confusion it's only human to dig the past and see it through the eyes of nostalgia or, be strongly tempted to elope in dreams of a make-believe future. Trust me, if you can hold your ground now, if you can pull yourself up and refuse to succumb, if you can look right into the eyes of the adversity yours is this world my friend and everything that moves it.
Love,
Vikas
23-Aug-2011

are you game?

mentations while biking:
If you are not the best in what you are doing then either you are playing too small or playing a wrong game.
Sweat it out,
Vikas
18-Aug-2011

another evening, another _____ ..

Sipping tea in his balcony with Ghalib's gazals in the background painting the ambiance blue, those familiar foot steps draw his attention. He pretends not to have taken notice though deep inside he has come alive just as a lost Gypsy finds a settlement in the middle of a desert. She comes and hugs him from behind, that known fragrance freshens the air, that known touch swamps his emptiness. They say nothing yet it's all said.
Just to make sure he pinches himself; alas, it doesn't hurt!
Love,
Vikas
7-Aug-2011

मन: स्थितिअ

thoughts on a rainy day:
Khamosh hai gamgeen hai, suljhano main ulajate hue. Wo betabiyan wo junoon aur mera swayam bhi pighalte hue. Phir aaj apna pratibimbh nazar aaya, phir se zindagi ne ye samjahaya ki fizool hi tu bhaagta hai auron ki khushion ke peeche, haanfta, nerashaand aur aapakesha se bharpoor. Do pal ki is zindagi main kuch lamhe khud ke liye bhi chura le, kuch geet likh, kuch gunguna khuli bahon se tu sab apnaa....
Go, live,
Vikas

5-Aug-2011

तुम

Sochta hun kai baar ye baithe tujhe phool kahun, tujhe chand kahun ya saavan ki bauchaar kahun. Kabhi lagti ho oos ki boond si to kabhi ek nadee, chanchal, beparwah, zindagi se bhari. Phir lagta hai tumhe seemit karna mumkin na hoga. Tum to apne jaisi ho, bas apne hi jaisi ho...
Yours,
Vikas
29-July-2011

headwind..?? why not!

Who better but a cyclist will tell you how the headwind seems to be ones greatest foe and tailwind ones best friend. But an experienced rider also knows that it's only the headwind that trains you to become a better athlete in the bargain, which makes you put in that extra effort today, something that will separate you from them on the judgement day.
Headwind is but what we call problems in life where YOU are the cyclist.
Keep riding,
Vikas
27-July-2011

झूठी जीत या सच्ची हार

Kya sthaan hai apne ahamm (ego) ka is zindagi main ye to shayad main tumhe bata na sakun, par ye zaroor keh sakta hun ki apno se uppar ahamm to kya, kuch bhi nahi hai, kuch bhi nahi.....
Lazmi hai ki tum sahi ho ya ho sakta hai ki theek honge way log, par kya karoge apni jeet ka jab wo apne tumhari hatth k chalte tumhare saath hokar bhi milon duur honge; pyase aur udaas. Is sansaar main jeet aur haar ki paribhasha shayad samay chalte badal gaye hai. Sahi mainay main kisi ki haar main apni jeet dhoondna aaj bhi haar hi hai.
Love,
Vikas
24-July-2011

खलल

Thoughts while commuting:
Uljhano ke is jaal main jahan yaadein aksar aaya jaya karti hain, aapakshayon ka ek toota maakan hai. Suna hai wahan kuch masoom khawab bhi rehte hain; masoom hi honge nahi to apni khushiyan khud hi main dhoond lete. Itne barson ho gaye ki ab ghar mujhme ya main ghar main, farak nahi lagta.....
Love,
Vikas
22-July-2011

attitude is everything!

post lunch thoughts:
You give me incompetence but a good attitude I will make a gem out of you. A competent but a bad-attitude man will survive but surely won't go as far. Fortunately or unfortunately, competence and good attitude come as a package. Few have both, most have none.
Die hard,
Vikas
19-July-2011

ये कैसी जीत...?

Nikal aaye hain bahut duur lekin shayad wo bachpana wo nirdoshita kahin raaste main chod aaye hain. Fikar karte hain un cheezon jinka hamare aaj se ya aane wale kal se koi vaasta nahi, ya agar hai to hona nahi chaiyae. So kar bhi sote nahi, jaag kar bhi jaagte nahi, jahan hain wahan hote nahi. Ye waqt hai shayad aapne hi aandar aapne astitav ko dhoondne ka.
Jiyo jee bhar ke,
Vikas
4-July-2011

अधूरे सपने

Ye Chandani raat, ghana kohra, kuch boonden aur tum. Dekh sakta hoon tumhe par mehsos nahi kar sakta, tumhari hassi ke saath ye aankhen bewafai si karti hui, sun na chahta hun bahut kuch par tum kuch kehte bhi to nahi. Kya tumhari ye ek aur shararat hai ya phir se wahi khawab dastak de raha hai. Khawab hi hai shayad, hamein haqikat main kadam rakhe to barson ho gaye...
Love,
Vikas
28-June-2011

as simple as that

No problem is big enough if I stay on it long enough with a resolve hard enough!
Cheers,
Vikas
24-June-2011

a choice so simple

don't compromise with life, or life will compromise with you. Stand for nothing but the best and guess what, that's what you get...
Love,
Vikas
10-June-2011

either learn or learn

Breakthrough lies in learning when you least want to learn. Learn from the learners and the one's who aren't. Learn to unlearn, and every time you don't act from your learning never forget to learn.
Love,
Vikas
10-June-2011

a sweet memory in a bitter reality

‎..and then I close my eyes. I can smell the deodars, feel the cold wind on my bare skin while basking in the sweet winter sunshine. In a moment I am free; the quietness of mind, the lightness of body makes the worldly chatter insignificant. I had the time of my life in LD. My riches lie in the moments like these.
Once I open my eyes I am back in my cubicle with a long day ahead and deadline on the calender!
live your dreams,
Vikas
20-May-2011

my best quote

whatever you belong to, belongs to you.
Much love,
Vikas
14-May-2011

too much little OR little too much

Little did I know then, how little I knew. The more I experience, the more I learn that how little I know.
Love,
Vikas
13-May-2011

the idea of selflessness

what is selflessness? Is it just an idea fancied by some to get a high; a boost to the self esteem or an emotional supercharge or worse still, a dangerous feed to the demonic ego?
I guess the above holds true only if selflessness is attached to an expectation or an end result. If it is free of the cause or an effect, if it is just a function of an individual's choice, selflessness is indeed a virtue.
selflessly yours :),
Vikas
09-May-2011 (My Parents anniversary)

be YOU

There is pleasure in simplicity, joy in being yourself, peace when one excuses himself from comparisons, trickery or deceit. In this world where everyone is trying to be somebody else to please a similar breed of phoneys, I'd rather be... just me! The day you'll live for an idea or that one dream, you'd be free. GO FLY :)
Lots of love,
Vikas
29-Apr-2011

The Untrodden Path

He walks amidst the dusty storm: directionless. It's completely dark in the desert now. Every subsequent step is only heavier with his body and mind wanting to submit at every single inch. His parched lips, which will be happy at the touch of even the slightest trickle of sweat are chapped and are mumbling something; Something hard to decipher, for what can you say when your soul is too drained to voice out. Even before his brain can register, he falls on his knees with a thud. Unable to keep his eyes open and balance steadily on his knees he drops with his head half dug in the sand. Lying their motionless, inside and out, he thinks of what is and what could have been, although he has got no fair idea of either. An honest answer to all the choices in his life has always eluded him.

Under the long heavy breaths he can hear his heartbeat, slow and loud. He is aware of his increasing reaction time and decresing agility . He tries to open his eyes but then gives up. In these moments of stillness which feel like eternity, a strange sedated calm bestes his being: a solemn state where there are no wishes, an inert space where there are no positives or negatives, a co-ordinate where there are no rights and wrongs. He is at a strange composure and total acceptance of himself.

What circumvented him from being what he was now for whole of his life? Why had this Shangri-la inside had eluded him?
- Was it his own cowardice hidden behind confusion?
OR
- Was it so important to seek the approval of the so called society; Which is nothing but a bunch of lunatics determined to pull you down at every step and dedicated to enslave your free spirit.

May be it was an amalgam of both of these and some dross like fear and 'looking good'. But it didn't matter now. Oh, it shouldn't have mattered then.
He found it sad that how a child, carefree and freewheeler, losses the battle of his innocence, bit by bit at every step where his free spirit impinges with the suffocated sphere of society, until both coalesce and he becomes the society himself, unfortunately, lamentably.
He was amused at his naivety for what seemed obvious now was not even a considerable option then. Blinded by worldly desires, given to indulgences, overshadowed by fear, passion, jealously, greed, oh how could he fail to see the obvious!

Fleeting glimpses of past flash. The base of all the moments when he sees that he was completely, as they say, in-the-zone was freedom.
Freedom from fear and freedom to be; freedom so thorough, a freedom so free.

It's midnight. Suddenly he comes to present with a shudder owing to the cold in this merciless desert. A thin trail of saliva drips down from his mouth and none of the body parts respond to the signals from the mind. Inspite of his grave physical condition, his mind is immaculately peaceful and this serenity is visible on his face. There is no one to be and no where to reach. He experiences a freefall into an infinite tunnel of white light. The weightlessness experienced by his body is an understatement, for what he felt touches the realms of metaphysical and further deep.
A lullaby starts playing in his mind, the one his mother used to sing for him when he was child. He tries to hum to the tune until he falls asleep.

Next morning few travellers from across the border find a man on top of a dune. There is a thin layer of sand deposited on his torso, appears that the desert had blanketed him so that the child who had lost his path or may be found his destiny, may sleep unperturbed. The serenity and smile on corpse's face is uncanny. Roostam was at peace...finally...

Love,
Vikas
19-July-2010

listen to yourself.. who else will?

don't let these moments of confusion and dissatisfaction pass away with time, don't push this uneasiness in some corner. All this is but brooming the garbage under the carpet. Sit on the upheaval in your head, sleep on it.
It is questioning the moments like these that have produced the greatest men we know. Somewhere all of us know what is to be done. Unfortunately, we just give up to some fabricated fear inside.
Love,
Vikas
18-Apr-2011

no mistakes only learnings

I make a mistake to associate myself to this ego. I make a mistake of thinking that something will last forever. I make a mistake to jumping to conclusions, of reacting than responding; but in all this I never make a mistake to not learn from my mistakes :)
Love,
Vikas
29-Mar-2011

the more I ride..

The more I ride the more I realize how much less I know and how much work lies ahead. The more I ride, the more is the clarity. The more I ride, the better I become.
Keep riding,
Vikas
13-Mar-2011

बस इतना सा ख्वाब है ...

Azaad nahi, gulaam hoon is soch ka, kuch aadaton ka. Band kar dena chahta hun is dimaag ko, jo har waqt shor machaye rakhta hai.
Chala jana chahta hun apni cycle pe kahin door pahadon pe, jahan phone ki ghanti, dilli ka shor-gul, aur har cheez samya badhya na ho. Jahan aaj bhi ajnabee ek doosre ko dekh kar muskuraya karte hain..
Love,
Vikas
3-Mar-2011

life and bike

Life is like a bicycle. Smallest of the parts is just as important and indispensable, each component has a precise function for harmonious working and no lone part ain't much a use independently. Make sure you inspect, service and nourish, not just once but periodically..... and not just the bike.
Keep riding,
Vikas
17-Feb-2011